Mangle Your Metaphors

Are you the Obama of your social circle? Do you mix a graceful speaking style with impeccably coherent content? Does your genius for conversation have people wondering if you’re too good to be true? Yeah, we get that all the time too, so we’re happy to give this “social fixing” app our highest recommendation. This ingenious little app suggests erroneous mashups of common aphorisms, metaphors and colloquialisms. All you do is just pepper them into your conversations.

Three free samples to try out before you plunk down your $1.99. Utter one and pretend that you didn’t notice how badly you mashed-up your metaphors, then kick back and watch as your social value decreases exponentially:

“That’s just six and a half, one dozen of the other.”
“Good Lord I’m tired, I’ve been working like a slave driver.”
“Only those that swallow know themselves.”

The first app that purposefully undermines your social value by tarnishing your silvery tongue.