Zilch

What app do you get for the guy who already owns them all? Nada, Nothing. In a word, the Zilch app. You deserve a little quiet in your life, and Zilch delivers. When you launch it, the Zilch app does nothing. And it always will. That’s a promise to you.* No upgrades. Only complete and utter nothingness. Not even noise so it’s über-discreet. For a smallish reoccurring fee you can launch this app any time you need to catch your breath from the rigors of everyday life or from the conversation with your dinner companion.

But wait, there’s no more. Order now and nothing more happens even quicker. Impress your friends and co-workers by being relaxed-conceptual.

*Zilch is guaranteed not to do anything for as long as it remains installed on your iPhone. If disabled, Zilch is not responsible for nothing.